Networking is a super useful way to increase your reach and to meet interesting people who help you build your business. So I keep doing it, and with results. But wow, it IS an intense task.

For some people, networking comes naturally. For a lot of people, it’s a huge step every time. Luckily: it gets easier and becomes more comfortable.

Thinking back on my networking behaviour through the years, I start laughing a bit. Because I went through some hugely awkward stuff. But I still want to share these fails, just to let you know what didn’t work out, and that it is fine to be clumsy or helpless sometimes.

Fail #1 - I got banned from this organisation’s events

A couple of years ago, I was at an event for an organisation whose clients are creative professionals, just like mine. At the end of the lovely evening, I enthusiastically handed out my business card to everyone at the event. I simply pushed my card into their hands and waved goodbye.

But the organisation didn’t like that at all. They were heavily pissed off and requested me not to attend their events ever again, unless I checked personally beforehand.

I felt so low. This had been a double fail: handing out a card without a conversation has zero impact. Connection is the key. And I seriously missed out on acknowledging my place, which blew my reputation. I was facepalming big time, because I actually love the organisation and I saw any future collaboration opportunities going to dust.

Luckily, over time, I was able to explain the misunderstanding to them and I’m allowed at their events again. But what a lesson I learned.

Fail #2 - Serving potential clients is a huge turnoff

When I go to networking events, I talk to quite a few people. What I do afterwards is to connect online: follow them on Instagram or LinkedIn. I always send a personal message as well, about our conversation and that I liked meeting them. So far, so good.

But what I also did - and now I realise what a huge turnoff that is: I included in that first personal message a link to book an intro talk.

You could say, hey, that’s a nice and helpful thing to do, because an intro talk is free. But I realised: new people don’t know me well enough to see this as helpful, it just comes across way too salesy. Like I’ve been nice to them at the event, just to be able to lure them into my evil intro talk (lol).

Fail #3 - What am I doing?

A realisation I had after my first couple of networking events: I stumbled when I had to explain who I am and what I do. I always started freestyling and said something different every time. It must’ve been confusing. So I worked out a clear and short pitch. It’s a huge help, it brings ease for me. And clarity to the person I’m talking to.

Sidenote: if you don’t have a good pitch yet, you can make one with the help of my free toolkit.

Fail #4 - Going in blind

This fail dates only from a couple of weeks ago. I was at OFFF in Barcelona, which is the Coachella of networking events for creatives. With 3 days of keynotes on huge stages, countless workshops and masterclasses, this event welcomes 4500 international visitors a day, mainly illustrators, designers and agencies.

I thought I prepared well by carefully listing the keynotes I wanted to attend. I expected the connecting itself would come naturally. With thousands of conversation opportunities a day, what could go wrong?

Turns out: networking in a huge crowd is way more difficult than in a more intimate setting. I should’ve prepared the networking as well, by letting the world know I was planning to attend, and by connecting beforehand with interesting attendees. Luckily, Jonas, a super generous illustrator and experienced OFFF-visitor, took me under his wings, so I learned how to approach this the next time.

Was I happy at the end of this trip? Yes. But it was humbling as well. Because of the size of the event, my usual approach clearly didn’t work. Also, I’ll email the organizer with an unsolicited suggestion: it would be great to make it possible for attendees to wear a visible sign when they’re open to new connections, as this is not a networking event pur sang. Some sort of sticker would make clear what your goal is at OFFF.

So. Despite these networking fails, I’m still a strong believer in networking. Because more often than not, it works super well. When there’s a click with someone, a good conversation and sometimes a collaboration later on, for example. Also: people remember you, talk about you, recommend you.

What about you? Do you like to network? Why (not)?

To end this letter, I would like to challenge you to:

Plan one networking event in your agenda
Before you go: think about what exactly you want to get from that event
Just go there
Commit to talking to at least 2 strangers