Almost five years ago, when I was working as a project manager at an ambitious start-up, life brought me a massive brainfuck.
I woke up with a crazy headache. By the time I arrived at my job, I couldn’t read or speak. My manager rushed me to the hospital. The doctors concluded: encephalitis - which is an inflammation of the brain.
For seven days they kept me in an artificial coma, since the pain was unbearable. I spent three weeks in the hospital, but my memories are quite vague. The only thing I knew, is that I ended up with permanent damage at the left side of my brain.
Rehabilitation period
I was transferred to a revalidation unit, where I had to learn how to speak again, how to use the right grammar. I had to train my short-term memory, which was vanished. Making a puzzle for 6-year-olds? Impossible. Ten minutes in front of a computer screen? Made me completely nauseous. Driving a car? Out of the question.
For eight months in a row, I trained these lost skills that seemed so obvious before. Life seemed to give me no choice. The doctors told me that my options for the future were somewhat limited.
I must admit: It was frustrating as hell. It went too slow. But steadily, I started to think and dream about how I would shape my new life. I decided that I had a choice. And that I wanted to choose wisely.
I knew more than ever that I wanted to put my skillset to good use. I also realised that I needed to do it at my own pace. At the pace of my ‘new brain’. With lots of sleep and rest.
I chose to rethink my life
I chose to change my path. I chose to start my own business, follow my ambition to coach creatives (their boundless passion for their work and unwavering drive never fails to amaze me!) and help them with my organisational insights and planning skills.
One year and a half after entering the hospital, with a business plan in my pocket (after following a short course at Starterslabo), and with a lot of research and experiments, I started I support creatives.
To be honest, I hesitated for a long time to share this super personal story in my newsletter. I was coping with the fear that sharing it could possibly harm my business. But the truth is, it makes me even more valuable as a coach.
Every time a client hears my story - because sometimes I tell it to illustrate ‘the power of choice’ - it works super motivational for their own beliefs, their own courage to choose the non-evident or unexpected direction.
My life now is
different, with more breaks. More need for silence and alone time. It is often difficult to balance my enthusiasm and drive with a body/brain that controls how fast I can go. So I’m not on the TGV, I’m on the slow train, the one that stops at every station. But while sitting on that one, I admire the passing landscape way more attentively. I truly appreciate small moments of happiness and often choose more risky roads. Traveling alone, or moving to another city, for example.
My funky brain
Living with my funky brain teaches me valuable lessons. It has shown me that while some circumstances are beyond our control, we still have the power to shape our own lives and find our own paths. I have learned that my strongest muscle is resilience. I have always believed that I could keep stretching my abilities.
We often think we have no choice. But we do. Every morning when I wake up, I am happy to be alive. Happy with my choice to make a difference.