Damn 😅. You said yes to a cool job, you even dived into that assignment already. But you realize you didn’t talk about your fee.

Or you said yes to a job, you agreed on a budget. And then the client starts asking a little extra here and a small tiny task there. Before you know, you put way more time in it than you calculated. And the actual job doesn’t match the initial briefing anymore, at all.

Or. You’re a creative professional. Your business is going well. And from time to time you get emails from other creatives who want to pick your brain on how to get started. They want to grab a coffee together and talk. On the one hand, you love that kind of conversation. You love to share knowledge and empower others. But then again, you realize how you will lose a whole afternoon. And actually, some of these coffee moments exhaust you.

Welllll

In all these situations, it’s completely okay to say no. Or to be very clear on your conditions. To draw a line and not let anyone cross it.

Giving your client or colleague clarity is not wrong.
As a service provider, we’re often afraid that clients will no longer like us & no longer hire us when we set things straight.
But did you know that your business relationships will be even better when you’re clear about your expectations?

Also: being clear does not mean being unfriendly or arrogant. You can combine your enthusiasm and passion about a job with asking a decent fee.
Even more: If you do not ask for a decent fee, your work will be viewed as less valuable.

“Hi [name new client], before I dive into this super cool job, I want to talk budget. Attached you find my full quote and conditions. The moment you give me a ‘go’ on that [and received the first installment], I can get started.”

“Hi [name client], of course I can do [small extra job that was not in the initial briefing]. That will take some extra time, however, that is not calculated in the initial quote. The [small extra job] will add [amount] to the initial quote. Let me know if that is fine for you, then I can add [small extra job] to my to do list.”

“Hi [name of starting creative], how great you want to get started with your own [insert creative profession]. Thanks for reaching out to me - it‘s super helpful to pick the brain of a more experienced colleague. Therefore I even reserve some space in my agenda to talk to starters and share my tips with you. You can reserve a ‘pick my brain spot’ (€xx for half-hour video-call).”

You just read 3 examples of nice words👆🏼. Friendly and professional. To make clear where your boundaries are. To make sure that YOU are the one that’s in charge of your agenda and time - not someone else. And to make clear that your time is valuable.

Being nice is a good thing. But you don’t need to be sweet.

Sweet as in: saying yes out of fear of losing clients (you will not lose clients by being clear).
Sweet as in: being overly helpful (clients/colleagues are not friends or family).
Sweet as in: letting others overrule your plans (and burn yourself out mentally & financially).

Do you identify as a woman? Then you need to be extra alert for this👆🏼. Apparently, girls are taught from the moment they can walk and speak to be sweet, to be pleasing, make sure everyone around them is happy. It’s a dynamic in which women are afraid to be perceived as arrogant or unkind. It’s a difficult balance to be friendly and clear at the same time. And it takes some time and exercise and effort to overcome the automatic pleasing. To become a smiling pit bull: friendly but persisting.

Do you not identify as a woman? Then this dynamic 👆🏼 is interesting to be aware of as well, and to act upon if you see it happening. 🙌🏼

Does all this mean you can never do something extra for a good client?
Or you can never plan coffee breaks with newbies or strangers?

Of course not. But it’s oh so valuable to first ask yourself: what do I want? What is MY best interest in this? Is this something that fits into MY planning right now? The answer could as well be YES.

Putting yourself first is not about being egocentric, it’s about keeping sane while running a healthy business.